Is there a set of rules for what to talk about on each date?
Monica and Paul are on their first date. And Paul cuts himself in the middle of a personal story. Monica is all ears and is eager to hear the end of it. But Paul is still hesitant and instead explains the abrupt pause.
Paul: No, it's, it's more of a fifth date kinda revelation
That made me wonder, is there a some kind of set of rules of what you are supposed to talk about on a date? So I went to research it and here is what I found:
First date. It is all about getting a general picture and feeling if you in fact are attracted to each other. You talk about light stuff. Like with any story you would usually start with locations. Where are you from? Talk about it for a bit. Than you would normally move on touching every small talk topics there is. Think weather, food, TV shows and hobbies. Y After all that you'd ask for a check and go home. And if you liked everything you saw and heard you'd ask for a second date.
Second date. Now you go in with a bit more heated questions. With questions that invite full stories. What is your family like? Are you close with your mom? Why so? Go share your dreams and goals, see if they match with the ones the person across the table has. Maybe tease each other with some Would you rather questions, like 'would you rather be invisible or be able to fly?' It could be a real good fun this second date, unlike the third one.
Third date. Ok, by now we sort of saw the ad campaign. Now it is time to see if you guys can afford each other. Third date is about getting clear on what your intentions are and revealing boundaries. I just got divorced and I don't want anything serious for the next couple of years. I have two kids and I need to raise them close to their biological father in New York. I have sworn not to have sex before marriage. You reveal things like that. Scary but that is time. If they walk away, it is tough, but in the end it really saves you both time and struggle. The awesome part if you pull through this date, the fourth one is a party!
Fourth date. Congratulations you made it! You guys know what is the full deal and you have agreed to give it a go. So now the tension loosens and the laughter naturally comes out. You aren't the random strangers you were just a couple dates ago. You joke, you touch, you just connect better and it feels like joy. That is time to tease each other with more fun questions. For some it might be the time to share stories about exes. Talk about lifestyles and get cozy with each other, because the fifth date is coming. Yes, it is the one!
Fifth date. That is when the SEX is officially on the table. If you are not waiting until you guys ready to get married, that is when you (supposedly) do it! Fun huh? Now you know why Monica's date Paul while refusing to talk about sensitive sex related topic of his, adds that it would be the fifth date kind of revelation.
Disclaimer. You don't owe your dating style to anybody. As long as you have this other other person consent, you guys are free to rock'n'roll this dating life in any way you want. Cheers!
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